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I suck.

August 30, 2011

Less than 48 hours into this venture, and I’m already down 25% of my flock. I feel like shit. It’s been a bad couple of days to begin with, and now I have a dead chicken on my conscience; a chicken death I brought about through my own negligence. I forgot to properly latch the gate closed and my room mate’s boxer apparently pried it open and partially dispatched the chicken.

 

DAMNIT! I even heard what I thought were sounds of chicken distress, but told myself it was the neighbors’ flock.

When I went out to backyard I noticed the gate was ajar—and then saw guilty Boxer with a half dead chicken. At least, I hope it was half dead. It certainly was all dead after I took a shovel to its head. She was on her side, her beak open, gasping, eyes half closed, and blood coming out of her mouth. Should I have checked to make sure she actually fatally wounded? What if she was just in shock and had scratched her tongue or something? What if I murdered a chicken that could have recovered? I suppose its too late for guessing games now. What’s done is done. Still, I hate to think that my ineptitude (on various levels) caused an animal any amount of pain and suffering.

I suck. Just another thing I’ve failed at in a long litany of failures these past few days.

Sad smile

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One Comment leave one →
  1. funder permalink
    August 30, 2011 10:52 am

    Chickens have short lives. The first few deaths are pretty terrible (my first drowned in the stock tank! I felt like the world’s worst chicken owner.) but it gets easier. You did the right thing dispatching her; they aren’t particularly robust critters and she probably would’ve died anyway. Now that you know what *your* chickens sound like when they’re upset, you are primed to go running outside to check on them.

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