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Crisis

February 10, 2010

So I got hired for a job.

Too bad I hate it.

Apparently the subtext of “community organizer” is “someone who goes door to door asking people to donate money they don’t have…in the freezing cold.” It’s basically like being a telemarketer except people have the opportunity to yell at you to your face instead of just over the phone. Have you tried asking people who just lost their jobs to donate $25 to your cause? When their in the middle of putting the baby to bed? Or in the middle of dinner? Or in the middle of doing anything else more enjoyable than standing in the doorway while you make them feel guilty for not supporting the environment? Yeah, I got yelled off a few porches. I don’t know that I’m man enough for this job.

I support the function of the job, I really do. I have a hippie side. I’m green. I’m hip to the movement. It’s for a great cause. But I hate the form of the job. I just don’t feel comfortable asking people for money at their door. It’s invasive and exploitative.

But its the only place that’s offered to hire me. It’s only for two months, the hours fit in my schedule and the potential for money is good. So do I sacrifice my sanity or my bank account? Do I stick with the job and tough it out, but subject myself to porch yellings and crying on street corners when people are really mean? Or do I nix on the job, risk not being able to find anything else, and plunge into debt?

I’ve been lucky with my jobs. I’ve only had a few jobs I hated. And those were a long time ago. I learned to only take jobs that would make me happy. And for the past few years, I’ve been really happy with my jobs. It’s a tough transition to go from being obscenely happy with a job to going to a job you hate.

Should I invest more time in making horses my career? I’ve heard from everyone (parents, friends, even people in the horse industry) that horses are not a way to make a living. They should be kept as a hobby to enjoy only after you’ve come home from your REAL job that can actually support your horse addiction. But I don’t want to be someone that slaves all day at a soul numbing job in order to afford something that they end up being too tired or too busy to actually enjoy. I’d rather live in a trailer and be content with my career decision.

Life’s too short for bad horses, right? So isn’t it too short for crappy jobs? But it’s also a really long time to spend living in a car when you don’t have any money…

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. February 10, 2010 9:49 pm

    I feel for your situation. I had to take a job canvassing for greenpeace about 15 years ago, in december in michigan. very miserable, looking back one of the bleakest times of my life. signature gathering can be almost as soul numbing. the people that i saw who did well at it were either true believers or people who enjoyed sales. The good thing you get out of it is if you can talk people out of their money you can pretty much do anything you want with your life. If you’re making quota and their not treating you like shit i would stick it out and see what you can learn. Fund-raising is a great transferable skill. If you want to make a living doing something largely unmarketable raising $ is not a bad place to start. good luck with it.

  2. February 11, 2010 3:20 am

    My, my, i have gone through that also. One time when me and my partner knock on somebody’s door, the awful owner release her dog and chased us up, up to the third street block. We were frightened like hell. hahhahaha, we learned our lesson that day…but we actually enjoyed that job stint because we met people who were so considerate and just kind.

  3. goamwat permalink*
    February 11, 2010 3:42 am

    Thanks for the comments. I’m still undecided about what I’ll do. I’m such a non-confrontational person though. I don’t know if I could handle denial after denial and door after door of people telling me how I ruined their day and to get a real job. It would be better if I had a partner….but the canvassers go alone. So I can’t even laugh it off with anyone. I’m just afraid the negativity from the job would leech into other areas of my life.

    But still…I need the money.

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