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Moving Time

January 9, 2010

So apparently I’m moving.
Either today or tomorrow morning, depending on whether our pipes thaw out.
I’m moving? Wha-what?
I’m in the throes of an existential crisis right now. I don’t know what I’m doing with my life or why. I feel like it was a different person who decided to go to grad school and move to FT. Collins. I’m vacillating between looking out of the kitchen window at a gloriously blue and white Colorado winter and looking at my packed bags and I’m unable to reconcile the two.
I’m moving?
Why am I doing this again? Why am I leaving my wood stove and log cabin and horse kisses and tiny farm cats?
Oh right, grad school.
Why am I going to grad school?
Sometimes I’m afraid that going back to school is less about school and more an excuse to stay in Colorado and delay the real world for a few more years.
All hesitations and misgivings aside, I am excited for the change. Especially since it’s only going to be a four month trial change. Then I return to Home Sweet Ranch.
I’m excited to make new friends. To have more than six people live within a two mile radius. To have convenient suburban shopping again. To have access to indoor arenas so I can ride. To study. To have a paycheck again. To be able to hike a bit because the snowfall isn’t quite as horrendous. To be able to see a movie without a 45 minute drive. To have a girl room mate. To have a clean townhome without generations of dust embedded into the carpet. To have an excuse to wear girl clothes again. To have an excuse to wear makeup.
I am excited.
It’s like taking a mini-vacation. I love my horseback riding, snow filled, gun toting, camo wearing, small town life here. I love it. It’s ultimately what I want. But a temporary change of pace could be fun.
And I can always call the ranch.
And have a bunch of excuses to visit.
And I’ll be back in four months.

Still, I will really miss the horse kisses.

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